Calling all leaders! YES YOU! Don’t run away from being the leader you were called to be. Let’s erase all doubt with this profound definition by Leadership guru John Maxwell, “Leadership is influence.”
We all hold influence in various capacities, with friends, family, at work, in the church, on social media, the list is endless. We’re in the age of influencers. All this to say: This article is a timely one and it’s for you. Read on...
“Don’t be nice. Be genuine. Be authentic.”
Everyone wants to be liked, it’s human nature. The irony is that when we spend all our energy trying to be liked, we not only become unlikeable because it smells of fakeness, but we become ineffective as leaders.
When our goal is being liked, it’s a losing game because we are trying to manage people’s feelings towards us. The truth is we can’t manage feelings. Emotions or feelings by definition are erratic. Jumping into that emotion full field will turn us into basket cases.
Now how do we construct an effective leadership style when it seems everyone is living “in their feelings”???
There’s a fine line to walk - we must never ignore how people feel but we also should not jump into their feelings with them, and YET we need to touch situations with the message “I hear you.”
We are all human and it’s a beautiful thing to be able to identify with one another. There’s nothing that is unique to one person, we mirror each other in different ways and that’s what helps us connect.
Today’s leadership requires emotional intelligence (EQ) more than ever. We are all hungry to connect. There is tonnes of information that has been written about EQ, but what does it look like to be emotionally intelligent?
It means that I manage my own emotions by sticking to the facts. I run far away from pettiness by making sure I’m not making decisions based on hearsay or past negative interactions. I remain on mission.
This takes practice. As leaders we aim to grow and evolve as we learn and lead.
How do I grow my EQ?
Focus on your mission. Answer this question for yourself: Why am I here? Not everything needs your mental, emotional, and spiritual energy. Giving your energy away to every situation will leave you bankrupt as a leader. We lose our ability to lead when we let go of the mission to solve every problem. Consider the one of the most prominent leaders in the bible, Moses. To stop him from getting involved in every little matter God told him to elect leaders in the tribes of Israel (Deutronomy 1: 9 - 18).
As leaders we are answerable to our Leader, the Lord Jesus Christ. We have a mission that was predestined for us to undertake. We must constantly check in to make sure we are serving our purpose. Meditate upon 2 Timothy 2:4, “No one serving as a soldier gets entangled in civilian affairs, but rather tries to please his commanding officer.”
Be vigilant about what is in your sphere of concern. Not everything is our business. Every now and then we have to remind ourselves “This is none of my business”. Not to be rude, but this is true compassion. It demonstrates these words:
I hear you. I empathize. I’m of no use in this matter, therefore I choose to step back and away. I am eliminating the noise from your matter. That’s my service to you. To allow you to focus on what matters to your own wellbeing.
Life should not be stressful. Get rid of the things that are none of your business. We have enough energy, drive, and resilience for the task that God has made us for. Embrace peace, love it, it will make you flourish. How so?
Being present for our mission allows us to see the opportunities God is giving us. God is always speaking. Be still enough in your mind, body, and soul to hear what the King of Kings says to His children. As an heir to the Kingdom, you need to sit at his feet in order to understand how to rule over your inheritance. That’s how we become visionary in our leadership.
Let us not be like the prodigal son who tried to create his own path with his inheritance. We will lose our inheritance and eat the food of pigs.
2 Corinthians 3: 17 “Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.”
When we operate from a place of authenticity, we allow our personality to serve our spirit.~ Oprah Winfrey
That’s the definition of freedom. That’s power. That’s what leadership requires. For us to be used as a vessel for the glory of God.
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